Body Shaming 101

The world is getting more and progressive as the days go by. The fat acceptance movement is growing rapidly and fervent campaigning to encourage acceptance of women's bodies has swept the internet, as well as the mainstream media. However, we live in the age of insta-famous models, photoshop and distorted ideas of femininity and womanhood. In a twisted turn of events we seemed to have gone back on ourselves and provide conflicting messages of self-confidence to women (and men) everywhere. The hit singer Meghan Trainor tells us that "every inch of you is perfect" but only if we aren't "skinny bitches" and Victoria's Secret launches a campaign called "The Perfect Body" featuring size 0 models.

In January this year, an advertisement on the London Underground for Protein World caused a huge backlash featuring a rather toned model with the caption asking if the observer was "Beach Body Ready?"

The extremely negative responses to the advertisement still didn't manage to drown out the few who saw absolutely nothing wrong with the image. Katie Hopkins, British television personality and columnist, openly supports the adverts saying there is "huge acceptance" for being fat and there are very few who don't take offence to being told what a beach body is. Personally, I don't know what world Katie Hopkins is living in but it definitely isn't this one. The world we live in is not only not fat-friendly but it more often presents itself as not woman-friendly. From one side of the media, we are told "real women have curves" but from another, we are told that a beach-worthy body must look like how Protein World thinks it should. The perfect size - is it a size 6? Is it a size 12? What happens when you don't have curves like Beyonce but you don't look like Kate Upton either? What if your wide hips don't come with the 36DD bra size that they are expected to?
 
Really, there is no perfect body. You cannot win. There will always be something wrong according to someone else. Society, this includes both men and women, finds endless ways to shame women into picking their bodies apart until they dissect all their flaws and search for ways to fix them. Why? Because industry depends on it. Billions of pounds rely on women being brought to puddles of tears when looking in the mirror, leaving big businesses to thrive off a young girl's low self esteem. Products like slimming shakes, botox and cosmetic surgery procedures are marketed to an insecure audience, creating a desire for something you don't need but society thinks you do. Society breaks you in order to fix yourself with these products. 

Furthermore, with the arrival of social media, this need has increased tenfold. It's not just in our everyday lives that we work on ourselves, it's our online lives. Creating a persona online makes it easier to seem like you fit the image that we put on a pedestal. Simultaneously, we're putting pressure on ourselves to recreate this in our real lives. 

It's 2015 and it's never been more difficult to accept your body as beautiful, no matter what it looks like. I struggle every day to stop myself from hating my body but I am well aware. I'm aware of my surroundings and how easy it is to hate myself. Being female nowadays is a lot like the lyrics in Kelly Clarkson's song "You Can't Win": "If you're thin, poor little walking disease. If you're not, they're all screaming obese."

So what do we do? How do we love ourselves in a world that tells us otherwise? I'm still figuring it out myself but simply just start by surrounding yourself with people who support you. It's not okay to keep people around who don't accept your body confidence and encourage negative thoughts. But when it comes down to it, it's about saying a big, fat "screw you!" to body shaming, whether you are a size 4 or a size 14.

Will America ever deal with discrimination?

Recently, the footage of Sandra Bland's aggressive encounter with a police officer in America stopping her for a "routine traffic stop" has been all over social media, Twitter as such. If you haven't seen this video, please do so before you read on.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CBh3wzXd3vg&spfreload=10

In the video, it's pretty clear that the officer is revelling in his own authority and pushing for the harshest of sentences. Without a doubt, Sandra Bland was right when she said in the voice mail to her friend - "How did switching lanes with no signal turn into all of this?"
 
Because you were black, Sandra. And because that officer was a racist.
 
Moreover, another American has died unnecessarily simply because of the fact that the American police force are still, up to this day and age, embedded with layers of racism - and funnily enough still won't learn. It's painful and inhuman every time a story like this hits the news, which seems to be becoming a monthly occurrence, minus the ones that don't hit the headlines - which happen every day under our noses. Even so, the headlines are so far from the truth it hits us with an even bigger punch.
 
This is racism. Not just a shooting, police violence or suicide. It's racism.  

The same was happening with the Charleston shooting earlier this year. This absurd event wasn't just a crazed man wandering into a church full of people, firing his weapon like a child with silly string - that was a racist man targeting black people and marking his targets. Was it reported in the latter way though? Of course it wasn't. Why? Because America fail to admit on the global stage that it has not dealt with racism.
 
Take Donald Trump for example, America's tall and proud would-be brother to Nigel Farage. He's running for president in the 2016 elections and was fondly quoted saying "They're bringing drugs, they're bringing crime. They're rapists, and some, I assume, are good people, but I speak to border guards, and they're telling us what we're getting." in regard to Mexicans crossing the border. I'll admit, he's probably worse than Farage.
The worst part is that from the polls and ratings, he's actually a top candidate. Another example of an opinionated multi-millionaire bringing a meaningless form of politics to a country in immediate need of addressing it's problems with racism.
 
Sandra Bland's death has unusual written all over it. No one will ever likely know what went on in her jail cell that led to her death. However, the fact is that something just didn't add up. An extremely hostile police officer forcefully arrests a black woman for a wrong manoeuvre and then she, under questionable circumstances, dies in police custody in the following days? You don't have to be a conspiracy theorist to understand the truth behind this.

I can't expect a nation who host's a population of almost 600 million people to hear the voice of a teenager in a small town in England, but, America - you still have a problem with race and it needs fixing. This is not something that should go ignored.

Will Supergirl make or break the superhero genre for women?

As of 26th October this year, the brand new live action TV series Supergirl will air in the U.S on CBS. Although there have been many incarnations of Supergirl both in Smallville and various Superman films, this will be her first leap onto the small screen as a leading protagonist. Honestly, in my opinion she has the potential to be on of the most important and most interesting female superheroes in years.

It's true, since the emergence of new and breed of superhero franchises initiated by films like Nolan's gritty Batman franchise, Marvel's Avengers films, and TV shows (such as The Flash, Arrow and Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D etc.), women have existed in all sorts of capacities, as part of teams, as individuals and within sub-plots. However, other than Agent Carter we haven't had a female fronted superhero-themed show in years. Whilst I, naturally, adore Agent Carter and everything she stands for as a kick ass, flawed and complex human being, it's exciting to see a woman with a supernatural trick up her sleeve finally lead a franchise.

What will be interesting to see is whether she will be as well received by the public as her male counterparts. Though this version of Supergirl is for the most part fresh and new, there is no doubt for many of the general public she will just appear to be a gender-bent version of Clark Kent.

Though personally, I think the trailer looks really promising, there's already been much criticism of it and it's leaked pilot with many arguing the format of the show resembles a rom-com, that it's clearly "aimed at girls". As if these things are a bad thing? Personally, I think it's fantastic they're trying to appeal to a new generation of girls who may have been put off by the more testosterone fuelled Marvel and DC movies/TV shows, or are looking for a more light hearted superhero TV show compared to the darkness of Daredevil or Gotham.

What I'm even more interested to see is how the show's writers will create a story for Supergirl that will be just as interesting as Clark Kent's. It may be a lot to lay on her shoulders but I really hope she'll become the gold standard of how women should be represented in the superhero genre. 

Although we have a Captain Marvel on the horizon and a Wonderwoman appearance in the Batman vs Superman movie, as Supergirl premiers long before those it's success could pave the way for other female superheroes to take the stage as leads on the big and small screen. Regardless of what the media says, this TV show is an incredible step and I'm definitely rooting for her (even if I am more of a Marvel fan than DC).

Caitlyn Jenner

Honestly, Caitlyn Jenner is possibly one of the bravest people in modern media today. It takes a lot to stay true to yourself in this day and age, especially if you are somebody who is under constant scrutiny by papparazi and media every waking moment. Celebrities are often driven to extreme diets, drugs or, in the case of Britney Spears, even severe breakdowns because of their requirement to uphold a certain standard every second of every day. Yet Caitlyn stuck to her wishes and finally became the person that she wanted to be. She did it despite the backlash and hatred she may have received from her transition, and she did it in full view of her fans, family and the entire world. To tell your family is one step, but to transition in front of the whole world is absolutely remarkable.

Which brings me to rant about the disrespect towards Caitlyn's decision. I am sick and tired of seeing people who purposely use the wrong pronouns when talking about Caitlyn, or claim that they're "still calling her Bruce." It is the 21st Century, 2015 to be exact, why do we still live in a world where some people still can't get their head around someone else's transition? You, yourself are not going through the struggles Caitlyn or her family are going through, so the LEAST you could do is have some respect. I understand Bruce Jenner was an American hero and still is. Only now, under a new identity. Caitlyn Jenner is a beautiful woman who has clearly struggled her whole life regarding her identity, and now that she has the courage to be true to not only herself, but everyone around her, people can't help but find fault in that. 

Caitlyn being so open about her transition should be seen as inspiring, not only to the trans/LGBT community, but also the CIS community too. Caitlyn promotes nothing but being true to yourself, and to me that is admirable. Furthermore, the celebrities who think it's okay to be so openly ignorant about the whole situation are unbelievable. You would think they, of all people would know better. Why would someone who knows of their impact upon young people promote such behaviour? Regardless of your beliefs, you should find it in you to be a decent human being and treat her with the respect she deserves. If you can't find it in you to accept the situation for what it is, do not comment at all. It is not our lives to live therefore not our place to make any kind of judgement.

Exams, exams, exams!

So currently countless people are within exam season - eeeek, scary. Oh, exams. Where do I start? The revision, the pressure, the waiting around, I just can't cope properly! Many people have this problem, whether it's "end of year tests", GCSE exams or A-Levels, all can be very daunting. So the feeling...

The feeling is horrible! The stomach turning, the head spinning unknown terror that fills your head, walking into a hall surrounded by chairs and singular desks... It just seems like a whirlpool of water that you're eventually going to drown in. The endless panicking and being unable to breathe - it's a brilliant way to start off an exam, right? (IT REALLY ISN'T!)

Being the overly pessimistic person I am, I can't take you through good studying tips and try to work my magic into decreasing your endless road to stress. Instead, how about some BAD study tips?

1. Worry about everything, every little thing! It all has the power to make you fail.
2. Believe you're going to fail, because after all, you're going to fail.
3. Sleep with your textbook under your pillow and the knowledge will magnificently be absorbed while you sleep.
4. Spend an hour straightening your hair the morning of an exam, even if you're a guy.
5. Get sick the week before an exam! If you catch something really bad, you could become delusional which will ease your stress levels.
6. Use your own blue pen to write with instead of a black one. The examiner will be impressed by your rebellion against society and will surely mark you higher!
7. Sleep deprivation. Stay up all night the day before your exam - you can just drink numerous cups of coffee/energy drinks and beat the exhaustion.
8. Finally, eat your notes and be amazed when knowledge is assimilated directly into your bloodstream!

So I know it's probably a blogger-taboo to leave your blog for so long but I pinky swear, it'll be back and flowy as ever after my last exam! Illnesses, exams, limited time - the outside world has doomed us all but like my pal, Van Gogh here, let's be positive. Best of luck to everyone taking exams, they'll soon be over and the sweet summer adventures will be amongst us!

Fifty Shades of Grey

So I took the time out today to watch Fifty Shades of Grey online. I'll admit, I've been intrigued to watch and possibly read. I mean, I was quite gutted that I was unable to take a trip to the big screen as it is an 18+ film. However after watching, I was left with the utmost rage and fury in every fibre of my body! Fifty Shades of Grey was not appealing to me at all, the story goes against everything I stand for and I can't help but rant about the utter disgust I feel about it.

First of all, the idea of romanticising abuse horrified me, making the unacceptable become accepted. It perpetuates the myth that women who are abused can change their abuser's behaviour if they simply just love them enough, obey them enough or submit enough. The insight on the abuser's behaviour is because they have had a difficult life, it is argued, as a loving partner they should understand it. From taking a look at key parts in the book to gather a "better understanding" (as many seem to arguably suggest) I noticed that the book removes a lot of responsibility for Christian's reactions. He isn't a person who has a will they can control, but a mere product of his experiences. He isn't responsible for how he treats Ana, as the myth goes, and if only she can love him enough, she can repair his broken past. This, of course, is absolute rubbish! The only person responsible for abuse is the abuser.

Fifty Shades of Grey cloaks the horror of domestic violence within clichés and metaphors, hiding the true nature of abusive power. By romanticising domestic abuse, it makes readers/viewers blind and numb to their reality - both in the fictional world and in reality.

To see why this blindness matters let's take a look at a few statistics:

• Somewhere between 60,000 and 85,000 women, and 8000 and 10,000 men are raped in the UK every year.
• One out of every three women has been beaten, coerced into sex or otherwise abused in her lifetime.
• The CPS estimates that around a million women in the UK are victims of domestic violence each year.
• In the UK, an average of 2 women a week get killed by abusive partners or husbands.

A reminder: this is the UK we are talking about. These crimes stand as massive condemnations of our society: we are consistently failing both male and female victims of domestic violence (this review concentrates on female victims merely because of the plot of the book). We cannot afford for abuse to romanticised. We cannot afford to think that Fifty Shades of Grey is a cutesy culture phenomenon which we can laugh about! These stories go on every day in our communities, places of work, schools and towns. Christian Grey is the romanticised abuser, hidden in cliché and metaphor, clothed in a robe of words that make it difficult to discern what is going on as domestic abuse.

This is not a book about sex, it is a book that masks domestic violence, romanticises abuse and means that the issue of consent becomes even more cloudy in our society than it already is.

Valentines Day

Personally, I think Valentine's Day is highly overrated. Year by year on the 14th of February couples prepare for their date at the cinema, reservation at a restaurant, or any other activity that clings to societies expectation of what is ‘romantic’ – which isn't as easy as it used to be.

Specifically for us single ladies it’s safe to bet that Valentines Day will most likely consist of a similar version of one of the following. A) remaining alone and consuming our own body weight in Ben and Jerry’s, dedicating the day to our favourite cheesy, cliché romance films that we know deep down, we wouldn't subject ourselves to at any other time of the year – or B) inviting the gal-pals over to celebrate being independent women who "don’t need men" but somehow result the night surrounded by empty pizza, and tissue boxes, bawling our eyes out over the heartbreaking realisation that Noah Calhoun from The Notebook doesn't exist in real life. 

In other words - the 14^th of February is basically a night full of agonising reminders of the reasons why we aren't on a date right now. 

Moreover, a feeling of equality is lost. Valentine's makes gender stereotype acceptable on that particular day. A majority of men are expected to book the tables, get the flowers and surprise the girl. So not only is V-Day overrated but also against gender equality.

When I was younger, I used to think Valentine's Day was romantic, a day set aside for people to celebrate their love together, and I still do! However I came to realise as I got older how stupid that thought is. Every day should be a day to celebrate your love with another, not just on this specific day.

Oh, the pressure of gift giving. It's not just the singles, but couples have it bad too! I hate to pull a Sheldon Cooper here, but you're not giving a gift, you're giving an obligation. Not to mention the worry of what the gift you give says about your relationship. What if they get you a thoughtful handmade scrapbook along with expensive jewellery, and you get them an apple?

My advice to all the singles out there - don't beat yourself up over not having a date/significant other this year. Instead, wake the fudge up and remind yourself that all the leftover chocolate in stores will be cut down to half price tomorrow morning (no pun intended, I promise).

Dress code

Oh, how dress code in America infuriates me. I may be from the UK, so I haven't been victimized of this matter but the fact that it only applies to females gives me a reason to rant.

Firstly, guys can wear shirts depicting women sexually (such as on a motorcycle wearing a bikini with half her breasts hanging out), whereas girls cannot wear a tank top that shows their shoulders and forearms, EVEN if her cleavage isn't on display. It is seen as wrong and distracting towards men's learning. 

In addition, how females choose to dress is their own style and expresses their personality. They are not trying to distract or harm anyone with inappropriate or ostentatious choice of clothing. Of course, there will be those who will stretch the rules to the limits and abuse the rights given so that it is taken away from those who don't abuse the right. Clothing does not distract anyone from learning, they should be focused on learning and succeeding rather than that a certain female has a very sexual looking shoulder. Undoubtedly, I do not know anyone that could "get off" or be "turned on" by a shoulder. It is not a sexual part of the body, nor is it even very attention grabbing. It is a mere body part that serves a use to everyday life. Why females should have to cover up a useful body part for the sake of men's learning is beyond me.

Sure women have to cover up for men's learning, but what are the men doing for women's learning? Yes, it is not all men, just like it's not all women, but it's just enough that it's a problem. Women being chastised by men during school is another way that men are the problem. Every woman is different in what they are given body wise. For instance, some women have bigger breasts than other women, just like some have bigger butts. To tell a women to cover up what she's given and CANNOT change is ridiculous!

If women showing their shoulders is considered wrong, why are men free to show their boxers? It's considered an undergarment and is practically on display. If the situation was switched, and women were showing their underwear, it would be a world meltdown. In other words, men are not held to the same standards as women, it is highly offensive and inappropriate. 

To conclude, human rights is the belief that everybody should be treated equally and with dignity no matter what the circumstances. Times have changed, and so have styles. It's significantly harder to find clothes that follow a specific dress code than it was thirty years ago. Styles are shorter, tighter and lower cut - this is not the fault of women! 

First post!

First post, slightly daunting. I feel as though I should explain why I'm here and give you a background as to who I am buuuut I don't think I will. Not today. I'll leave that for you to figure out. 
Though I will tell you my main intentions, which is to just have somewhere I can write about anything. Mostly about life in our society today as well as some stuff on books I've read or am currently reading. I'm extremely passionate about feminism so expect to see a couple posts regarding the topic. So this is it, welcome to my space.